Having Difficult Conversations

Hispanic couple discuss end-of-life wishes with daughter

Talking about life-limiting illness isn’t easy. We don’t want to rob our loved ones of hope. We think that maybe, by avoiding the conversation, we can protect them – and ourselves – from suffering, from anxiety, from the unknown.

But the very conversations we avoid are the ones that give us some measure of control. Sharing our worries and wishes brings connection and understanding. Exploring care alternatives and end-of-life options  gives us the facts we need to choose the best path.

The Power of Conversation

Talking about serious illness offers opportunities for you to control the things you can. Each family’s experience is unique, but these steps are key: 

Find someone you trust. 
Surround yourself with allies and advocates who can offer the emotional and practical support you need, and help you navigate the search for information and options. 

Ask questions. 
No questions are off limits.  Ask the people you love about their concerns and desires. Ask your physician about what is happening, what to expect, and what can be done.  Ask about alternatives for care and end-of-life options. And keep asking as long as you have questions.

Share your wishes. 
“I don’t want to be a burden.” “I want to go on a trip.” “I want to die at home.”  Be candid with caregivers about your wishes to guide the kind of support you want.  These goals may change over the course of an illness, so revisit the conversation.

Start now. 
There’s no “right” time to talk about the multitude of issues regarding the end-of-life, but it’s more helpful when conversations can be part of an ongoing process—instead of waiting until the situation has dramatically deteriorated or a crisis has occurred.  Discussing options at the beginning of a life-limiting illness can help you make choices in advance and guide your decision-making.

 

 

What Our Families Say

Please applaud everyone at the IPU for the loving care of my mom, 
hugs when I cried, answering questions when asked.  Thank you. ~ Patient's son

There are not words to describe how much everyone at Pikes Peak Hospice is appreciate. 
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking such great care of my loved one as she made her final journey. 
I will miss her terriby but am at peace because she was at peace in the end
which is largely due to the care of her Hospice team. 
Thank you to all the staff. ~ Patient's family

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Your Healthy Family - Have you made your end-of-life care decisions?
01 Oct

Listen to an interview with our Chief Medical Officer about how to hold what may be the most important conversation of your life.